Tuesday, October 09, 2007

 
Killing Them Softly

SENATOR
You don’t understand fuckin English! I wanna talk to the president.

AIDE
He’s unavailable.

SENATOR
Unavailable to me? He wasn’t unavailable on several other large occasions.

AIDE
Whatever you want me to tell him, I’ll...

SENATOR
Tell him for starters that his veto of Children’s Health Insurance totally
bums me out.

AIDE
It’s a complex issue. We can’t let the other party demagogue it.

SENATOR
The voters don’t care diddley shit about complexity. They care about
children being harmed. Is everyone up there too fuckin thick to
understand that?

AIDE
There may be a small compromise.

SENATOR
Your ass is a small compromise! I’m running in ‘08! I can write the copy
of their ads now. A trillion for wars, but for children... !

AIDE
As I say, they’ll demagogue it.

SENATOR
How dreadful of them! Don’t invite a one of them to your next tea-bagging!

AIDE
Will that be all, Sir?

SENATOR
Tell that fuckhead he might as well just shoot me!

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