Wednesday, June 30, 2010

 

Ohio never formally admitted to Union

I’m still mad that Right Wing Thieves there
cooked votes for Bush’s 2d term electoral “win.”

But since they look to be a state, let’s admit.
Might we thereupon keep, therefore, keener eyes?

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Tuesday, June 29, 2010

 

Gun News From Supreme Court

Something about my being
able to keep an AK47 in
the entertainment center

as my portion of the militia,
well regulated. Yahoo News

got hundreds of comments
equally as dumb as this one.
And the original amendment.

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Monday, June 28, 2010

 
“Don’t you wish ‘d go on forever?”*


R
Our astrologers tell us to keep on keeping on and we’re due
for thumping wins!

D
Sabotage and obstruction?

R
More like smarts.

D
More like treason.

R
Then we’ll take care of your “boy.” Beat or impeach
his black ass!

D
For your racist core?

R
They vote.

D
As do women, I hasten to remind you.

R
We’re talking that game. But then it’s back to the kitchen!
Nudies except for frilly aprons.

D
Sexists must be patient then?.

R
That’s correct. Not politically correct.

D
You’re proud to have the worst elements in our society!

R
It’s a big tent.

*Surrey With the Fringe On Top

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Sunday, June 27, 2010

 
Linguistic Cramp


to

bath
rune.

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Saturday, June 26, 2010

 

"They all laughed at Christopher Columbus"

For he was a cutup,
command dulling his edge.

Strain goes into others
and then you get-
ting the true, final cackle.

Insane concept that, more
Heisenberg than hilarity.


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Friday, June 25, 2010

 
Republicans Stop Further Payments to Unemployed

We're going all in! And fast!
Our soundings encouraging,
wealthier sailors ebullient.

If you're not one of these, in-
deed a drowning swimmer, then,
what part of go fuck yourself

can't you fathom? We'll help:
explications, too, trickling
down our brave mast.

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Thursday, June 24, 2010

 

Primary Candidate, Incumbent

Be-LIEVE? I believe in nothing.
Oh I can recite our mantra: small
government, tax cuts, etcetera

fuckin etcetera, and bash a gay
when it becomes–-Family!--
my turn.

Not to mention torturing
Constitution to give
every man an AK47.

Slash spending! Unless it involves
agencies where I place your
retarded nephews Elmo. Just

put one in FBI. He can’t tie his
shoelace, might as well be
a black one. Anyway,

Tea Party money pours in thus
I’ve really commenced the super-
babble.

Why is everything so funny?
It’s a gift from God!

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Wednesday, June 23, 2010

 

Republican Apologizes to BP

& hulla-fuckin-baloo! Jeez!
Just a dope trying to help his

buddies. Everyday thing re-
gardless of party.

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Tuesday, June 22, 2010

 

Youthful Question

“Mission Statement? Oh the younger members! Okay then,
we’re the Party of Business. The faster and looser the better.

Other party wants to apply the brakes! In a timid, scattered,
confused manner.

Easy choice then: like, between a man and a pussy.

Everybody laughs! Shows we’re on the right track! No pun intended.”

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Monday, June 21, 2010

 

Gardner executed by firing squad–CNN

4 in the chest I hear.
Utah did same favor

for Joe Hill: a few
across the left side.

Don’t know if aim-
ing for the heart
or Mormon wit.

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Sunday, June 20, 2010

 

The Ralph Bellamy Part

Nice guy losing the girl. Question in
the industry becomes Well, who’s got
The Ralph Bellamy Part? Upon more

serious soil, women often
lured by bums. I know of one
living with adventurous lover o-

ver Chinese laundry. A boy, still, he dies of--
whatever. Slow ponies, other women, sad booze.

She, destitute, works the front
of the house for the Chinaman.

They eventually marry
and she forevermore
smells of fresh steam.

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Saturday, June 19, 2010

 
Gilbert & Sullivan--Updated

I'm for The Rule of Law
when it favors me.

O when it favors,
when it favors etc.

O yes it favors! etc.
Ah yes must favor etc.

improvised patter follows, with softshoe

And that is why I’m completely for
The Necessary Rule of Law!
My Necessary Rule of Law!

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Friday, June 18, 2010

 
A Soft Spot

for crazies
in both parties.

One scorns international,
other wants Internationale.

Either’d AK47 each other,
those wily moderates agraze

at the margins ex-
piring ambiguously.

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Thursday, June 17, 2010

 
John Q and the Rich Man


-You have just about the whole pie! We’re left with sliver.
What more do...?

-To leave you a sniff.

-Ye have made of my house a den of thieves!

-Prefer the Jesus of the pretty pictures, leading faggots of the time in a Kumbaya dance. Doing the same in heaven,
if you can wait.

-Won’t meet you there.

-Nope. We make one here. Get some guts and join up.

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Wednesday, June 16, 2010

 
Review

Catch Tint-Zell last evening at Bruno & Kelsey.
Formerly a solo, Milky Gritti has added Lil-Eye Akimbo,
and to good effect. Sort of a marriage of Below Deep
Grunge and The Conservatory.

Her opening monolog, which I miss, entitled
I Fuckin Graduated!

They keep the transgendered bit of the original act,
she in tux resembling a prize fighter at a banquet
where the awards go elsewhere, he in a dusty
Victorian dress being hauled to the asylum during
a fit of butch.

When I walk in, they emit Celestial, a series of protracted
sexual moans accompanied by toy pianos.

The mid portion of the program, forgettable, at least
transcends his former interior stuff where one strained
to pick up a note or two.

In what will become their signature, Tint-Zell ends with
Patriotic Rag-Rage, several national anthems played by
flatulent horns of their own invention and recorded
on an old reel to reel. On playback they do a striptease.

Satire lost on one audience member who marches
and salutes variously, well past final nudity.

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Tuesday, June 15, 2010

 

Celebrity Dies

after misery,
so it seems

just enough
freak to
hold our sick

focus, still
passes on

buildup as legacy,
bizarre.

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Saturday, June 05, 2010

 
No posts till 6/15

 
The Incident

Yes, Japanese have wit. And some of it sarcastic. I give Mr Y the perfunctory bow, but mean it. He points out he doesn’t want clutter on the storeroom floor and instructs me to put one of the seldom-used printers on the scaffolding far above.
I climb the wheeled ladder with it and shoulder the printer into its niche, but lack the restraining strap. I explain to Mr Y it’s in my desk. He frowns as I begin climbing down--having lost face of course.

Suddenly the ladder whips left, then right, and back. Mr Y blankly stares at me as if I’m supplying some magical power. It’s an earthquake and everything shakes. Mr Y pitches forward to his knees just as the printer tumbles past me onto
his gray head.

I sub on the company’s emergency medical team and, when I can get off the ladder, ascertain he’s unfortunately dead.
I run for the strap, cut it with scissors and score and gouge
the two ends with a screwdriver. Climb back up the ladder and...well you know.

Then, see were I can help out the nurses.

Detective Hirwatari looks quizzical later, but shrugs. “Strap broke and printer fell--open and shut. But my superiors insist on report. And as crazy as it sounds, they’ll want to do forensics on that busted strap.”

So up I go to fetch it, sagging on the ladder as I anticipate disgrace and prison. Almost praying for an aftershock to distract him.

His cell phone sounds–-Eleanor Rigby ringtone would you believe?--and he becomes quite animated. “All right.
All right! Many dead in Komura district, so very many more reports needed! Damn Japanese preservationists want ancient neighborhoods saved. History, don’t you know?
A history of toothpicks!”

I hand him the strap. He glances at it and flings it
into the clutter.

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Friday, June 04, 2010

 

Hillary Clinton: Rich aren't paying fair share

Hey we innovate! New
Lords of Real Production,

hiring while John Q shits
and fucks and sleeps.

Soak him more
and us even less

if you desire,
as you must for

your own sake,
our nobility.

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Thursday, June 03, 2010

 

Miranda Refreshed

Suspect must break silence
to assert it. Is Law fatal-

ly trapped into fatuity?
No matter

how many strive?
Wrapped in such
because of us?

Or language
itself?

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Wednesday, June 02, 2010

 

Comparative Jurisprudence

-Now with Treason, we shoot the bastards first, then
have the trial.

-What if the dead person is found not guilty?

-That can't happen. The execution being the original verdict.

-Sounds like there's a little coercion in the law.

-More like a little law in the coercion.

-Like here.

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Tuesday, June 01, 2010

 

Permutation

Well you’ve slid 180 and just
as impertinent. Problem is

those peckerheads at
a roar here. Strange bed-
fellows, as proverb tells.

So? Don’t let them near
the property. For they’re

dribbling and gross where
you’re elegant. Graceful nub

installed in acid core, though,
by your similars. Meeting with

exquisite pastries and them,
you wittily decry reigning as

wryly cerebral in such
a desert of cretins.

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