Monday, November 01, 2010
Election Night, Not So Large Market
DIRECTOR
Okay, Talent, let's try things out.
TALENT
This is a set? Looks like an elephant shit in a paint bucket!
DESIGNER
This is a set like you're definitely not a commentator!
DIRECTOR
Oops we hafta go on! Quick, powder his nose. It's like a beacon!
DESIGNER
No big deal, just a souse.
TALENT
I heard that, Fairy Designer!
DIRECTOR
Now girls. Ten seconds to airtime, Talent.
TALENT
Whaaa...?
DIRECTOR
Just read what's in front of you.
TALENT
Eighteen votes are in from Chester’s third precinct
and it looks like bad news for Democrats.
DIRECTOR
Cut!
TALENT
That's it?
DIRECTOR
We're weaving in and out of Football Highlights to begin.
But don’t worry we go big in a couple of hours. Bring in
the experts! The winners to gloat and the losers to analyze.
Later
TALENT
Nearly seventy votes are in from Chester's third precinct and
Republicans are worried.
DIRECTOR
Cut.
TALENT
It’s still dribbling, despite your promises.
DESIGNER
Like a drunk pissing. Just a generic comment.
DIRECTOR
Your set is beautiful and we no longer need you.
TALENT
Yeah, go way and give us the chance to destroy it.
DESIGNER
Why do we always get hasbeens from the network?
DIRECTOR
We do the best we can and we're perpetually for sale.
DESIGNER
Not much job security.
TALENT
You can always paint shithouses.
DIRECTOR
And go! Talent.
TALENT
Most of the vote is in in Edgemont and no clear winners yet due to tallying write-ins for, among others, Mickey Mouse.
(off) He always gets a vote or three!
TALENT
It's our own resident wit, Patty Kleinhoffer, returning
from the field on this historic...!
DIRECTOR
Okay, Talent, let's try things out.
TALENT
This is a set? Looks like an elephant shit in a paint bucket!
DESIGNER
This is a set like you're definitely not a commentator!
DIRECTOR
Oops we hafta go on! Quick, powder his nose. It's like a beacon!
DESIGNER
No big deal, just a souse.
TALENT
I heard that, Fairy Designer!
DIRECTOR
Now girls. Ten seconds to airtime, Talent.
TALENT
Whaaa...?
DIRECTOR
Just read what's in front of you.
TALENT
Eighteen votes are in from Chester’s third precinct
and it looks like bad news for Democrats.
DIRECTOR
Cut!
TALENT
That's it?
DIRECTOR
We're weaving in and out of Football Highlights to begin.
But don’t worry we go big in a couple of hours. Bring in
the experts! The winners to gloat and the losers to analyze.
Later
TALENT
Nearly seventy votes are in from Chester's third precinct and
Republicans are worried.
DIRECTOR
Cut.
TALENT
It’s still dribbling, despite your promises.
DESIGNER
Like a drunk pissing. Just a generic comment.
DIRECTOR
Your set is beautiful and we no longer need you.
TALENT
Yeah, go way and give us the chance to destroy it.
DESIGNER
Why do we always get hasbeens from the network?
DIRECTOR
We do the best we can and we're perpetually for sale.
DESIGNER
Not much job security.
TALENT
You can always paint shithouses.
DIRECTOR
And go! Talent.
TALENT
Most of the vote is in in Edgemont and no clear winners yet due to tallying write-ins for, among others, Mickey Mouse.
(off) He always gets a vote or three!
TALENT
It's our own resident wit, Patty Kleinhoffer, returning
from the field on this historic...!
Labels: election, small market TV
