Sunday, February 17, 2013
Living Together in Housekeeping
-So, how is sin working out?
-Splendidly. We were on our way to a record...
-When...?
-Something fell in the closet.
-Ah, the moment of mystery! What, mid accumulated junk,
could it be?
-Never found out, but we cleaned out the blasted thing
for three hours!
-Never knew that about her. Neat-freak of the highest order?
-Not a tenth of it. I mean there’s no category high enough
for her. Later she found speck of dust in a kitchen cup and...
-Let me guess. Six hours?
-Two solid days!
-So the back burners are immaculate, and sex has been placed upon them.
-Now she’s started on me, who naively thought the
après la passion shower to be sexy?
-She...?
-just about scrubbed my skin off.!
-How about between hanky and panky and housekeeping
and intensest personal hygiene? What do you lovebirds do?
-Why we rhett up!
-That’s Pennsylvania Dutch! You’re Catholics!
-She was a waitress in some tourist trap around Lancaster.
They had to learn all the cutesy-pootsey expressions.
Plus actually neatening up the dump in slack times.
-Man but you do smell of soap! I thought an Ivory Truck
had exploded nearby.
-Never mind all that! There’s an impasse to deal with,
a puzzle, a conundrum, a...
-Call it what you will. When are you two announcing
The Banns?
-Like, I wanna talk to some priest and get scalded
for fornication?
-Yes, but don’t forget extra credit for cleanliness.
Bible big on that! Anyway, carry missal in your pocket.
Impress the horny old fart.
-You’re of no use!-–pouring water on a drowning man.
-That’s Holy Water. But let’s just be a little modern and daring this time--unlike our stodgy friends. The whole wedding party dressed as pirates?
-Yeah? What’ll she be?
-Why Black Bart of course!
Labels: Banns, clean, housekeeping, neat, neat freak, relationship, sex
