Monday, November 17, 2014
At the Movies
Vince and the Women and the Men
Vince in line when the woman approaches.
"I'm looking for a man with a big you-
know-what. The whole package!"
"I see. How about those Mets?"
"How about them indeed! Excuse me while
I move on."
(to Ralph, returning with popcorn) “That woman
desires me, I think.”
"Well, act! Are you a homosexual?"
"Nope. I'm afraid of men too.
"Still living with Mother?"
"She passed, unfortunately. Boy could she
cook! Roast Beef with oven-browned potatoes,
Christ! Now I throw crap in the microwave!"
"Well, that's a clue. You need a motherly
woman that cooks. Probably content with
cuddles, with the Big Event few and far
between."
"I'd compromise."
"Okay! Let's word it! NO SEX BOMBS!
WANTED, MATURE LADY
COMFORTABLE WITH CHILD-LIKE
NERD. HOME COOKING!"
"Doesn't that last have a sexual meaning?"
"I suppose. If it's a wild card, keep it in!"
"Okay. I've had dreams where I was daring!"
"We won't overdo it."
“Oven-browned! Mmmmm!”
“Pray.”
Labels: aggressive women, home cooking, nerd, personal ad, sex
