Monday, March 09, 2009
Short Financial Episode
INTERNAL CRITIC
I just have a couple of things to say and I’m outa here.
One, this firm has leveraged itself into absurdity. Eventually you have
to possess money! You must pay! No matter how many rings a circus has,
it eventually finds itself dark and nobody in the seats.
Two, we’ve fallen into the insurance business with credit default swaps
or whatever asinine labels they bear. There is no, I repeat, NO cash reserve
to pay claims. Not only will they come soon, but they’ll be arriving in floods!
I’d like to say we’re bankrupt, but it’s far worse. We’re actually ruined!
Well, I said my piece. Thanks for listening. And now I’m DEFINITELY outa here!
(door clicks)
COMMITTEE MEMBER
Wow!
CHAIRMAN
What a pussy!
INTERNAL CRITIC
I just have a couple of things to say and I’m outa here.
One, this firm has leveraged itself into absurdity. Eventually you have
to possess money! You must pay! No matter how many rings a circus has,
it eventually finds itself dark and nobody in the seats.
Two, we’ve fallen into the insurance business with credit default swaps
or whatever asinine labels they bear. There is no, I repeat, NO cash reserve
to pay claims. Not only will they come soon, but they’ll be arriving in floods!
I’d like to say we’re bankrupt, but it’s far worse. We’re actually ruined!
Well, I said my piece. Thanks for listening. And now I’m DEFINITELY outa here!
(door clicks)
COMMITTEE MEMBER
Wow!
CHAIRMAN
What a pussy!
Labels: bankruptcy, credit default swaps, insurance, leverage
