Thursday, April 23, 2015
The American Constitutional Monarchy
Hardly without bitter opposition from other families with
ancient claims, but the Holy Zollerns were picked to be
America's Royal Family.
The "Holy" came through a smattering of priests, ministers,
and even rabbis.
But the best recommendation consisted of a crop of
handsome wastrels.
From that, not ecclesiastics of course, a King would be chosen.
As it was. King Hogate, the initial ruler of the American
Constitutional Monarchy!
“Twenty-Second Century,” gloated Senator Bissing(OK)
“and we have finally finally arrived!”
Hogate, the greatest wastrel of them all, a former ski-surf bum,
instantly took the reins--and the women.
It didn't go well with the former.
"I'm ruling by whatchacallit, Divine Right! Constitution's
a shit-rag."
When a delegation from Congress protested, he made
them kiss his feet, and kowtow backwards from the throne
room. All shown on video worldwide.
And too much of a demeaning disgrace even for a royalist
congressperson.
The women especially disheveled and hysterical.
At this historical point, Senator Einhuss of Pennsylvania, toasted
at Washington's Turf Club, "Long live the King! The new one, not
this stupid fuck!"
But they really hadn't made adequate plans for succession, and the
competing royal families started up again.
Intolerable. The King himself vowed beheadings, but couldn't
take the time away from weed and women.
His Guard surrounded him with machine pistols, always.
Which they, following historical tradition, turned on him.
Thus the American Royalist Experiment lasted about a year.
In another one, most of that persuasion were assassinated,
fled, or converted back to shoddy democracy.
After all this Civil War chaos, The New American Republic
was instituted.
It proved the old one, with even more bribery.
Most of the remaining Royalists followed their money to Bermuda,
looking hairy-knobby-kneed in the national shorts.
The young king is mourned, eighteen international films being made.
The tragedy is being exploited on Ebay, daily auctions of royal souvenirs that individual legislators have put up.
“Don’t give a fuck,
turn up a buck.”
But many feel they’ve carried the Congressional Motto too far!
“May you live in interesting times! cursed Chinamen a million
or so freakin years ago,” rapped the Bitchy Bees, a female group
heading, thank God, to Mars.
Labels: Absolutest, America's Royal Family, American Monarchists, American Royalists, Bermuda, bribery, Congress, Democracy, Mars, rap, senate
