Wednesday, April 06, 2022
Burners
Marcy presses
the burner phone
against her breast!
It slows her wild heartbeatfor some reason. Her
young Lieutenant having
returned to the wife,
M sobs again.
"Again!"
Labels: betrayal, broken heart, burner phone, cell phone, handsome, infidelity, used, wife, young
Saturday, September 29, 2018
Savage Music
-He beat that first wife like a drum!
-Horrible!
-I lived in the next-door apartment then.
-What did it sound like?
-G Major.
-Jesus!
-There is no key of J.
Labels: criminal, drums, Music, wife, wife beating
Friday, November 03, 2017
Mainspring
A (singing) Breaking up is
hard to do.
B With a wife, maybe. A girlfriend
not so much.
A How so?
B So.
A What's next?
B The world turns and doesn't give
a shit.
A Uh huh? How about the individuals
in it?
B They're a lost cause.
A I know one who is.
B No secret to me.
A How can you stand yourself?
B I don't have to. No one does.
B How so?
A I just pretend.
B What you do anyway. And what gets
you into trouble.
A Not so! The mainspring!
Labels: breakup, imagination, marriage, relationship, wife
Saturday, April 25, 2015
His Bell
You couldn't report yourself as missing.
Someone had to miss you, and wonder where
you've gotten to, and, of course, seek the help
of the police.
He went about, expecting a cruiser's stopping,
its blue light spinning down to still.
He had dropped his wallet, probably watching
Omar and Celeste in the new ape enclosure.
Had climbed an old fretwork that the apes had
formerly used, but now outside their fancy one.
Nobody turned it in to Lost and Found.
Just as well, since he forgot his name, and someone
would surely have asked, thence checking driver's license.
Ricky and Elinor, God's New Gifts absolutely, took him
home and fed him, tried questions to jog his memory.
No go.
That night they went to Lefty's Paradise to watch
Giants-Eagle on TV.
There the Professor guessed he had graduated Harvard,
and his fresh companion, the ex chorus boy, opined he
had the quickness of an athlete or dancer.
“Good and healthy and strong!” remarked Sudsy, who
hired him on the spot to unload trucks, flu having swept
his small firm.
Strictly under the table, since no Social Security number.
So he had found friends, a neighborhood, a hangout,
and a job!...and a name, Chauncey, bestowed by the Professor.
Not bad for his first disconcerting day.
That late night on the daybed gracing the sun porch,
he tried to fit some things together.
No use, but he replayed the football game in acutest detail.
Maybe that was kind of key?
Beatrice got interested in his story. She despatched trucks,
and started bringing him lunch. They dated, and eventually
he left his cozy daybed for her cramped studio apartment.
“Believe me, Chaunce fills it up without yours truly!”
Beats had season tickets for the Jets, but had promised them
to others in her family, but not for any playoff games.
The Bengals coming in for the first round got Chauncey so
excited he could hardly speak.
The old man checking the ticket with some sort of wand cried,
"Buzz Ackley! and they couldn’t find YOU better seats than THESE?"
Ripper Collins later sought him out with his mike for the Jumbotron.
..."But I'm not sure I'm he."
"Well, I'm sure! That ‘he’ gives it away: Pure Yalie!"
He took him down to the field and the young players, of course,
couldn't recognize him, but the twin gray-bearded trainers,
Hip and Bix, hugged him together, and massaged his shoulders.
She worked her laptop that evening. "You live in Nutley," she
told him, "18 Appletree Lane, wife Cindy, girl at Trenton State,
boy in Air Force."
They drove there next day, and Cindy fainted.
Detectives Markham and Pesticci were present, making sure that
Beats’ cautious phone call to Cindy wasn’t a con, and knew how to
revive her. Too, they swabbed his mouth for DNA. They explained
that they kept his case from the media since they believed it
involved the Mafia taking over sports memorabilia.
“We expected you were wearing a cement overcoat at the bottom
of a polluted pond in The Meadowlands somewhere.”
Cindy proved completely sure, and needed no DNA, so Beats left.
In a couple of weeks, Buzz recalled almost everything, and the
couple invited Beats back. Cindy told her she'd love her forever!
She became Aunt Beats at Christmas etc. to the youngsters
back from college and the Air Force.
Cindy, strangely, never had a jealous bone.
All the characters in this story of forgetting are pretty
unusual.
Buzz has more than his share of where did I put my...?
but functions appropriately enough for his age.
The League is kicking in to a fund to help those like him.
“I do remember every SINGLE time on the field that my bell
was truly rung!”
Labels: Bengals, characters, DNA, Eagles, football, forgetting, friends, Giants, Jets, Meadowlands, NFL, relationship, wife
Thursday, March 26, 2015
Power and Precision
-How much does it weigh?
-Do you mean here?
-Okay, let's assume in our further discussion
that we're referring to this latitude and longitude,
and not Mars, or Fiji, or Jackson Hole.
-Two-point-two kilos.
-How can your wife stand you?
-Who cares as to her trivial likes and dislikes!
-Ah hah! Sounds like Mr Precision gets Aces
slapped down on his little power-hand.
-Two-point-two kilos.
Labels: friendship, Metric System, power, power games, precision, relationship, wife
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Two Line Story
“And what should I be ashamed of now?” wife whispers.
He thinks of something quickly.
“And what should I be ashamed of now?” wife whispers.
He thinks of something quickly.
Labels: husband, relationship, wife
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Two Friends and a Wife
FRIEND1
He shook apart. I’d seen him tremble before, but this time parts of him flew off. Leg over the plasma TV as an example.
FRIEND2
That’s too much high definition for me. But we all
come close. I fall to pieces sang Patsy Cline. At any rate, something prevents it. Filters shove in, or friends.
FRIEND1
His dog had just died, and on top of everything else...no job, no wife, no girlfriend.
FRIEND2
That’s just it! Too much of a loner.
WIFE’S VOICE
If you two philosophers intend to replace that shower diversion valve, I suggest you hop to it!
FRIEND1
There’s a prime example: a sarcastic wife will filter life
for you and thus prevent your own flying apart.
FRIEND2
She has rescued me on many occasions, most when I didn’t wanna be. At any rate, got the Home Depot part right here. Would you deign to accompany me to the bathroom?
FRIEND1
With pleasure! ... Oh! A good bit cleaner than mine!
FRIEND2
Who desires to crap in a literal hole?
FRIEND1
Is that a rhetorical question? Hey! Such great acoustics in here!
FRIEND2
Thus will our learned discussion gain resonance.
FRIEND1
Let’s start with Budweiser. Allow me to pop both. Now, a toast to all the trouble in a world which tragically misses us when we’re occupied doing these pedestrian tasks.
FRIEND2
Amen to that. At another time, we’d be swimming in peasants to perform the dirty work.
FRIEND1
Sound from outside amplified in here too. What’s this newest resonance?
FRIEND2
The boyfriend.
FRIEND1
Isn’t it a strange world?
FRIEND2
People made it.
Labels: friendship, wife
