Tuesday, December 11, 2018
Wagging the Future
-Jump ahead to Presidential, 2024.
-And the winner will BE…!
-Whoever pays the most hush do-re-me
to loose broads.
-What if a woman runs?
-No reason to change the rule.
-Two women running?
-Why they’ll have each other!
-And what’ll happen to men like us
in this approaching Lesbo Frame?
-Has already happened, Precious.
-Yeah? Well no more you-know-what if you don’t soften much much further!
-No mercy?
-You’re so, like, totally BUTCH!
-Uh huh? Well I step in my Step-Ins every morning same way YOU do!
-Send a herky-jerky via CUNTBOOK!
Labels: butch, feminine, future, lesbian, macho, politics, President, wag
Monday, May 14, 2018
Picnic
Merrill wondered aloud as to
his courage. Or lack thereof.
Judd laughed that anyone who
had lived with Sissy for a year
earned the medal exempting
him from all shaky masculine doubt!
That joke proved contagious, even
degrading into drool.
Jeremy, our Brit, scalded the American
way of turning everything into a joke!
But Heather informed him that any
race that said so many asshole things
like The Battle of Waterloo was won
on the playing fields of Eton, well…!
Carla pipes up then.
As a lesbian.
What else?
Labels: American, British, courage, female, friends, humor, lesbian, male
Monday, September 04, 2017
Even-Tempered
Brelle and Lindsey befriended him at
his new job.
But the two women went missing the
following week.
He had enjoyed their chats at lunch and
on breaks.
They were found murdered in the fresh
apartment they had decided to share.
He dealt with mostly automated
systems at work, and now discovered
he had spoken to practically no one
in the past few days.
At breaks, he read his tablet as to
the murder. Felt uncomfortable
talking to anyone about it.
Hate Crime. Was the hateful slayer
nearby?
It all hurt him so.
In one particularly grinding
stretch of a couple of days,
he spoke to nobody at all.
Went home to TV and bed.
For those two full days, no phone
calls either.
His mother hadn’t buzzed since
arriving in Spain.
The detectives, asking questions
in a nearly empty office supplied by
Human Resources, thought all this odd.
His mother reached his cell during their visit.
Insisted on speaking Spanish.
He had to tell her that he’d get back to her
manana.
He did agree with the detectives as to
his isolation being strange.
That evening phoned his old buddies from
the former job and they decided to go to a
hockey game.
Detectives Max Herkle and Dora Moriarty
had meanwhile ruled him out as a suspect.
Dora: “That man has no motives, good or bad,
for anything!”
Labels: ., friends, friends at work, hate, hate crime, isolating work, lesbian, passive, personality, sensitive, suspect, work
Sunday, January 31, 2016
Whatever
Well Enough
Dr Kildeer Madesty had been
convincing.
Renz signed on to the "Revelation"
Weekend with his two exes.
Sweet Betsy too, his present
Off-and-On, but she had to
go back to Pike to nurse a
sick mother.
The other two left after the
second session for Ruthie's
place, "Whatever."
Adirondack spread left by her Dad.
“So, you were lesbians all along?”
he asked Detzy before they
departed in the singing cab.
“Whatever!”
Then the good doctor o'd on severe
uppers, and raved in the ambulance.
Thus, Renz remained. Fell for the
waitress by trying to decide her
degree of cuteness.
Mega mega cute, he concluded.
Helbore, the manager, presented
him with the bill for all.
He paid it and left with the waitress.
Been a year and she remains cute.
He bought a cake and she cried.
Labels: cute, ex, lesbian, psychology, therapy group
Sunday, December 27, 2015
Two Couples Impromptu
Fifth Anniversary—Double Bridge Neighborhood Group
Jeanette sang to Cloris as they danced in a hug,
When I’m not near the boy-eee I luh-uve, I love the girl
I’m near!
“We should get back.”
“They’re both swimming in the punch bowl by now.”
“Or…we’ll hafta reward them for waiting,” warned Cloris.
“He’ll get no nookie from THIS cookie!”
Wittiest thing said in the History of Womankind...both ladies,
it must be noted, bit high.
They crashed, giggling, into a drumset, and, through a small
door behind it, crawled into the tight room beneath the stage.
Jeanette kicked the door closed with her foot, cutting
the DJ’s patter.
Hogue and Bokey drained yet another vodka punch.
“This is good shit if they left the strawberry crap
outa it.”
Bokey nodded and then asked, “Should we find the girls?”
“I took mine out as a favor to her brother.”
“And I got mine…I don’t hardly remember.”
“Screw it! They’re probably lesbos anyhow.”
Labels: dance, DJ, high, lesbian, vague dates, vodka
Monday, March 02, 2015
“Just how do Lesbos do it?”
asked Ambrose.
“I don’t know, but they know how to press
each others double-hot buttons.”
“Tongue them, you mean.”
All this, while maneuvering the cables in
place to lift the 40s era safe from the floor,
out the place from whence the skylight had
been removed, and down to the street.
Ambrose continued the operation from
there. Maxy-O had jumped into the crane
on the roof, and awaited his instructions via
walky-talky.
Everything cautiously perfect. Then a
cable snapped, the ends looking like
bits of lightning.
The deep green safe hung at an angle
for a few beats, while the blue sky
darkened.
It slipped and plunged, flattening the
fleeing Ambrose.
They took him home and slid him under
the door to his wife, who, of course, had
never seen him that way.
Couldn’t resist all that last, and the Lesbians
should be pleased.
Labels: accident, coordinating work, death, joke, lesbian, marriage, work
Sunday, May 04, 2014
Porno Talk
-I'm not there with porn. Watching others doing it? No thanks.
-Would it matter if it were two males?
-I've not thought.
-Well...extraneous, or upsetting?
-Maybe, some of the latter.
-Lesbos?
-Please! No!
-How about watching yourself with a partner? Name the sex.
-I don't know.
-Well, I'd say you're about halfway there as a pervert.
-Perhaps a quarter.
-At any rate, a weak case.
-Yup. I'd put the world asleep. If they paid any attention at all.
-No chance of that!
Labels: homosexual, lesbian, porn, pornography
Saturday, March 02, 2013
Bwana
-My group of lesbian hunters is going to Africa.
-Excuse me for laughing, but you know what I
just HEARD?
-Do don't be juvenile this one time!
-Okay, I'll go along. But, then, I can't go along.
-Nope. Don't qualify.
-I wouldn’t want to join any group that'd
accept me as a member. Generally speaking.
Nothing personal.
-Let me top off your beer. Firing on no
cylinders.
-Well, just warming up. Are you accoutered
for this extraordinary trip with this more
extraordinary group?
-We don't consider it either, but yeah, I've
got comfortable hunting clothes and a gun
to stop an elephant.
-Make sure it's a boy.
-We usually do.
-I shot an elephant in my pajamas once.
How that elephant got into my pajamas I’ll
never know.
-Cease! Groucho Marx again.
-I could use the Marx Brothers right around here.
-And I the Marx Sisters.
-Oh well--and I'll cite my source this time--
you can rely on the old man's money. Billy Joel.
-It's how he shows love. You must always let
people show love in their own way.
-Who's stopping them? But I must leave.
My Incongruity Quotient is full for the nonce.
-You’ll stay for the roast lamb. My treat.
-Weakness, thy name is man!
-We’ve noticed.
Labels: Africa, Billy Joel, Groucho Marx, hunter, lesbian
Monday, September 19, 2011
Girls Kissing Each Other
Unreal on reality show
though seemingly deep.
Raging Evangelicals format
Their Bible to reverse such
awful sex, and weapon-
ize The Constitution thus
staunching resonant license.
Labels: Bible, Constitutionm, Evangelicals, lesbian, sex
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Imagining the Past
She in all black, athletic, blocky, her audible exasperation at the many cosmetic choices on CVS’s shelves.
Before This
-I won’t go into that party with you looking like a goddamned bull dyke! Get some makeup at least!
-But I am...
-But you don’t have to...
Labels: lesbian
