Thursday, May 19, 2022
Old Karens
never die! ("Hey, Limp-
Dick?" begins she
some dig.)
They just piss away
every which way.
Labels: death, die, female, Karen, male, Old Soldiers Home, sarcasm, Sexual Politics, sissy
Sunday, March 27, 2022
'scuse
Monday, December 17, 2018
The Man Who Let It All Go
To forget a woman.
Overdid it!
Starts looking like a bum at work.
Step from homeless!--no kidding.
How to straighten him out?
Steered him to Religion.
Scoffed he!
More secular and non-hick counseling
at the university? Just sneeringly argued
with everyone in the group!
Self-Help articles with blatant headlines
via the net from his friends?
He can’t stop laughing!
At the last termination interview at
our mutual--and meticulously cautious--
corporation, he suddenly discovers
“I truly truly literally STINK!”
Hardly intellectual.
Olfactory, rather.
He took off the next day to scrub himself,
actually iron his clothes!
At the meeting then to fire him, he’s
all quite immaculate charm!
all quite immaculate charm!
And, since big outfits will chose the solution of less publicity, and thus scanter Big-Shot-Attention, ordered to quietly get back to work.
And never ever again to darken any important doorway!
Really lucky to toil where nobody
gives a shit about you, yes?
Labels: diffidence, Executive, hygiene, nervous breakdown, personnel, procedure, psychology, religion, rules, sarcasm, self-help, work
Sunday, December 24, 2017
The Professor At the Bar
-Wonderful!
-But Life gave his laughter an acid tinge.
-Sad-bad.
-Died of an Acute Sarcastinoma!
-Never heard of one of those.
-They're all around.
-I must watch, uh...?
-whither thou goest!
-That too.
Labels: bar talk, death, experience, sarcasm, tone
Saturday, October 28, 2017
He knew his brain
a first draft
forever.
Unless...?
Hoped and prayed
this new woman
would put on
the adroit finish-
ing touches.
She did, to everyone’s
amazement
he became articulate,
even encyclopedic
after a while, and some
comments so pointed that
all his friends fled:
even sarcasm closed
to them by his flood-
ing words, damming
fragments of which
they still hear
in spasmodic dreams.
A woman’s voice,
clearly.
Labels: conversation, dreams, intellectual, men, personality, sarcasm, talking, transformation, women
Tuesday, July 11, 2017
Soft Racism
...it's part of the merriment
So, the gang goes to hockey
games because so few players
afro-darkie.
And those few we have fun with.
Not as much as with a black
couple sitting two rows in
front of us.
Hilarious escalation of remarks.
Cleverly veiled. Well, most.
They change their seats.
Anyway, our team loses though
we triumph!
All in fun! Though I grant you,
not altogether innocent.
Win some, lose some.
Now don’t think plain nasty!
If that couple in trouble, we’d give
‘em the sleeves outa our vests!
Labels: black, group, hockey, racist, sarcasm, vest
Wednesday, April 12, 2017
Claim In Usual Mode
Started each morning with
a mock toast of coffee:
“With charity towards none,
and malice towards all.”
A Republican, felt the greater
claim to Lincoln’s words.
Especially in parody.
Labels: Charity, Lincoln, malice, parody, Republican, Republican Humor, sarcasm
Wednesday, September 07, 2016
Acting the Parts
-Let us speak of Management Models!
-Okay, the supposed or the real?
-1 first.
-Agile. Aggressive. Creative. Even Brilliant!
-And the real? Or 2?
-Sucking ass continuously.
-While acting 1?
-Academy Award!
-That explains the haunting sound I’ve encountered in the Corridors of Greatness.
-Will never leave your ears.
-Midst the Cube Farms of...!
-That’s enough.
Labels: acting in business, attitude, cube farm, jargon, management, management models, models, office sarcasm, sarcasm
Monday, September 28, 2015
When
Deciding
-That choice is a real beauty: a box of fuckin guts or an urn of fuckin ashes!.
-Then why not burial at sea? Or jump in beforehand and drift to oblivion!
-Good! Let the sharks…!
-Too tough for them! Smelly too. The little nibbly guys?
-That'll take awhile.
-No hurry. Then bones drift ashore, bleach, bang together, disintegrate.
-Pretty! I mean it!
-So you don't always crack sarcastic?
-Not when I find something nice!
Labels: black, death, sarcasm, suicide, vision
Friday, June 05, 2015
I am dying, Egypt, dying
When Little Egypt passed,
Hennesy of The World apprised
sidekick Curly Ames: “History!”
“Oh yeah? Hootchie-choocher
up there with Treaty of Ghent?”
In the style of American Acid
very nearly almost alive presently.
Spreadsheets don’t
contain malcontents.
Labels: Antony, Cleopatra, Egypt, Little Egypt, sarcasm, Shakespeare, spreadsheet
Friday, November 07, 2014
Friend Setting off a Chat
-Needs a break!–-sick as a freakin dog
-Will he get it?
-Nah.
-That nah seems compounded of sarcasm
and tragedy.
-I got others in brighter colors.
-For light times at Black Rock?
-I’ll be Spencer Tracy!
-Don’t see it. Sorry. A Wally Cox role?
-Don Knotts I’d prefer. More resonance.
The women flocking round!
-Is anything serious?
-I’m still looking.
-So is Diogenes.
-That Minimum Wage job?
-Less. Tips to keep him moving.
-What’s he looking for here, really?
-A country.
Labels: Bad Day at Black Rock, Don Knotts, nation, sarcasm, sick, Spencer Tracy, tragedy, Wally Cox
Sunday, May 19, 2013
The Highwaymen
Pudge instructed Half-Loco in crossing.
“Make it close, so you can give the finger
to trucker.”
“You keep doing that and you misjudge one
day and they blot you up later on!”
Pudge laughed. "Ain't ever gonna happen that way."
He was right. He died in his sleep during a hellacious rainstorm.
Next morning Half-Loco borrowed a cellphone from
maintenance guy picking up tree limbs, to tell
Social Worker Fanny.
She, at the Station later, to Desk Sergeant “Pip” Ryan:
“I'm afraid one of my homeless passed.”
“Yeah? When he shooda run or punted?”
“Is everything a joke?”
“Definitely!”
Pudge instructed Half-Loco in crossing.
“Make it close, so you can give the finger
to trucker.”
“You keep doing that and you misjudge one
day and they blot you up later on!”
Pudge laughed. "Ain't ever gonna happen that way."
He was right. He died in his sleep during a hellacious rainstorm.
Next morning Half-Loco borrowed a cellphone from
maintenance guy picking up tree limbs, to tell
Social Worker Fanny.
She, at the Station later, to Desk Sergeant “Pip” Ryan:
“I'm afraid one of my homeless passed.”
“Yeah? When he shooda run or punted?”
“Is everything a joke?”
“Definitely!”
Labels: death, highway, homeless, police, sarcasm
