Tuesday, January 31, 2012

 

GOP Primary Season

Checking pipe-
dreams & fears,
since never in

the history of mankind,
this much spaghetti hung
from this many ears.

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Monday, January 30, 2012

 

LBO

On the platform one
flat, stale, and real-
ly profitable.

As with other Free
Market wonders,

more you uncover
the sleazier.

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Sunday, January 29, 2012

 
Evolving Couple

-Be out with another couple and they’d say they wanna make the service at such and such. And we'd quietly seethe.

-How come?

-The shame from our parents forcing us!

-What changed?

-Gradual. Next time out with them, we mildly ridiculed.
After that, benign tolerance. Then...asked a few questions.
And, finally, went along with them.

-And now?

-Still going along.

-Look out the window. That's twilight.

-No hurry.

-Hardly Defenders of the Faith!

-They also serve...

-Time has of way of running out.

-We've got light-years.

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Saturday, January 28, 2012

 
New Death Problems

When Jerry came home from work he danced around with his infant daughter, her tiny fist closed round his index finger.

“My Princess! You’re my princess!” whirled he faster
and faster.

Jeanette finally caught up and snatched the baby away as
Jerry collapsed into a sofa, purple-faced.

When the medics came they shook their heads.

The new Jerry loves the dancing part, and friends
can’t tell the difference.

After the initial diagnosis, the cloning had started,
and Dr Ricky’s team had to put New Jerry into
the accelerator when Jerry started failing.

Jeanette confided to Lucy-Lil, “Like to get him
more interested in sex. Guess they didn’t plug
that component in.”

“Let’s go to Radio Shack!” Lucy-Lil insisted.

Jeanette shook her off, having to worry about Prudential.
They were refusing to pay off since Jerry wasn’t
technically dead under the Cloning Act.

But they did offer half the policy amount. Lucy-Lil spat
“Huh! They don’t even have HALF a leg to stand on!”

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Friday, January 27, 2012

 

Trickle-Down

When guys upstairs
take short vacation,

ask me to look in
on cat. “Keep shower

just barely on,”
they implore,

“she likes going
in there for
occasional drink.”

Being cat-quick,
can snatch drips
from the air, but

mostly licks
the tiles.

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Thursday, January 26, 2012

 

Tour

He took me to a gigantic warehouse. Many people
revolved there.

"We call it the Turntable of Political Thieves. Just press the
button when a particular one is in position, and he or she fires out the chute."

"But how can I tell which are Republicans and which Democrats?"

"Does it matter?"

"To me it does. Republicans are artists!"

"Well, we can laser-dot them. You are forbidden, however,
to choose a masturbator."

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Wednesday, January 25, 2012

 
Boundaries

Those lines you've drawn
obliterated once more
by her or him.

Time again for
the little talk?

Uh huh. And on and on.
Or the final, fatal chop?
Bible says keep going

the same old way. Barnum
has another take.

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Tuesday, January 24, 2012

 
Gingrich

takes down Juan
Williams for ask-
ing while black.

Hee-Haws shriek their
resonant ecstacy. CSPAN

later shows assembled
black conservatives.

They are home with
Republicans, but say
naught comfortably.

Actually, on the Shield
of Righteous Freedom is
wrought hatred of them.

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Monday, January 23, 2012

 
Post

GOVERNOR-ELECT
Now let's get these union bastards!

ASSISTANT
Even though nary a word in campaign?

GOVERNOR-ELECT
Gave them a vacation. They’re big on that.

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Sunday, January 22, 2012

 

Staging

After Janky rearranged the furniture, he bumped into things during 3-AM trips to the bathroom.

He finally put things back the old way, but continued
to bump them.

Got tiny nightlight then.

Has dreamed, though, of loud scrapings and massive shadows.

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Saturday, January 21, 2012

 

Mrs vanIderstine

heard the kitchen girls describing some base Romeo
as a sex machine. However the process, she never
cared for it. Oh Mr v had his various Conchitas.
The latest just graduated from college, so...
progress in the area.

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Friday, January 20, 2012

 

How Whitely Pink In Pans,

massed audience pops
at SC's GOP debate. CNN

refuse to use its black-
seeking camera?

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Thursday, January 19, 2012

 

Impressive News Debut


-You're a first-termer and have already violated the
cardinal precept!

-With embellishments. O what a head!

-Never be caught in bed with a dead woman or a live boy!
You managed both at once.

-Well...been some drinking.

-The 9-1-1 call from the dwarf has gone viral.
Was he in the bed too?

-Takes such little space.

-Your bible-belting constituents will never send you back.

-I don't care. One-T-R as we say.

-Meaning?

-You can get rich in a term.

-Meanwhile, small criminal justice problem?

-Lady died of natural causes.

-And the boy?

-Cute!

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Wednesday, January 18, 2012

 

Photo making the rounds

shows Wall St “talent”
with cash stuffed in
pockets and mouth.

In tableau and sketch
such alleged satire hard-
ly new. The crazy money

troopers have split our sides be-
fore with Victorian melodramas

of sobbing widows and orphans
thrust into the freezing night,

or the maiden forced to deal
you know what or face another
ruining. Audience jeers her on.

The sarcastic claim such hacks
lack all soul. Though not in their
profession, grace does manifest

in these hilarious takes on showbiz.
University psychiatrists retort, though,

the whole business demonstrates
deepest internal loathing. Oh well,

those good doctors pilloried
soon enough in mad
Germanic accents.

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Tuesday, January 17, 2012

 
Love in the Afternoon

-(singing) with Celias up in...

-So long as it's not Carls. Your district wouldn't forgive that.

-Very high a few times and found short hairs on the pillow.

-Highest proportion of churchgoers in the world!

-Yeah but the sermons are abstract, really. Fiery but abstract.
And nobody wants to deal with sex.

-And what does your wife...?

-Like gunmen of old, she's got a partner.

-I hesitate to ask.

-Women soothe each other so much better. We find their network too fuzzy.

-Oh I can see the papers now and hear the TV jerkoffs.
Rural Cesspool!

-We have a small city or two in my bailiwick. And the activities in question are quite decidedly urban.

-Such a story’d have legs!

-Not a chance. There's been some nosing, but nobody talks down here. The few who have are shot dead out of
general principles.

-I'd throw in the sponge right now!

-Wise. This is my last term.

-Leaving a field littered with...?

-Hey! Show me a political field not littered with something!

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Monday, January 16, 2012

 
Talent

The Firm, ruined
for all intents and
seedy purposes

sucks bailout juice
from Uncle and amps
a truly magnificent

portion thereof for
bonuses, retaining
thus, executive "talent."

Any more of the latter
and we'll all be shoving
battered shopping carts

to rescue wretched lamps from
dumpsters and keep our place
at the raucous soup kitchen.

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Sunday, January 15, 2012

 

Offhand Lore

She wanted to be loved
for herself. Thus we

worked at sorting,
finally isolating one.
Begged her love

it also. But she couldn't
be bothered.

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Saturday, January 14, 2012

 
Future Expression

-Your Mr Pelham has carved himself a baseball cap from pillow foam.

-He's amusing. Does things to amuse the rest.

-Baseball caps are forbidden because of the haphazard ways they can be worn.

-Well, not strictly a baseball cap. Besides, where's the harm?

-That's always the first question on the road to chaos.

-I'll seize and destroy it.

-And him.

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Friday, January 13, 2012

 

Justice Delayed Is Not Justice Denied

Much blab inside the forums
of revolutionary revenge

against the 1%. Uh huh.
Well, laws exist to claw

molto back from their most
grotesque of brigands. Hearts

in righteous bosoms pray
legislators so rawly bribed,
and winking-nudged enforcers

will be broadly shamed thereby.
Good luck with that, and further
feel-warm moralistic fantasy.

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Thursday, January 12, 2012

 

Another Chapter of Magnificent Capitalism:
New Haven Railroad

Brakemen et al knew
they were speeding
down the shithole

when McGuinnes took over,
wife as "Color Consultant."

Too, McGinnis and VP McGowan
had Chrysler Imperials adapted

to ride the tracks to their
Litchfield cottages.

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Wednesday, January 11, 2012

 

The interminable campaign slogs on

so the vaunted Independent
winnows the statements &

TV screeds & robo-lies, both half
& total. Thus does he decide?

Not really. Mostly turned off
to begin with & then a few
sloppy impressions. Even

while waltzing into the booth he
awaits a platinum hunch. Finally
closes the deal. Which? Depends

on whether he had BM
or is holding it.

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Tuesday, January 10, 2012

 

Conservatism Q&A

-Why does Conservatism, which seeks to foster traditional values and their concomitant responsibilities, end up a boondoggle for the rich?

-Fair enough question which unfortunately cannot be answered just this moment. A special assembly
for your class has been planned. You can ask anything
wished and be more comfortable.

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Monday, January 09, 2012

 

Inevitable Republican Candidate

Lot of dull bastards out there
and they need a champion.

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Sunday, January 08, 2012

 
Artists


-The two little careerists get mentioned. Us, none.

-Oh well. They kissed much ass for such meagerness.

-Nonetheless, we're better.

-In the next world, justice will...

-I doubt it.

-Then why...?

-The work and our individual memory of it. Besides, I'm shy.
I don't want people suddenly asking me.

-I would: my explanations better put together than the original. Hey, it's not what you do but how you explain it!

-Sounds like another species of the fraud we despise.

-Even for me you're too pure.


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Saturday, January 07, 2012

 

When Baby-Talkers Grow Up

and life smashes down, they
file the oopy poopy doopy
in favor of something sharp-

ly hostle to each other, often
eliciting, appropriately enough,

tears. And going on
like this, and on

to old age when they shut
all together.

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Friday, January 06, 2012

 
Cougars Swear That

caustic witness blocks
the softer angles. Ah

yes, the romance! Uh
huh? Overhead once,
matron to dry other

on bus heading to
Springfield Mall,
Delaware County PA:

“Got myself a young guy.
They can go all night!”

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Thursday, January 05, 2012

 
The Bizarre Decision

And in disastrous aftermath, whence
algorithmic depth did you fetch
that from? As Wallace Stevens vacates,

you lay your brain upon a board and
pick the acrid colors out. But ex-
perience should provide a hedge

against missteps, no? Doesn’t, for
Mrs Poe's little boy Eddie posits
an Imp of the Perverse.

Who rides the bench, drying
his hands with a towel.

Itching to get in the game
and foul.

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Wednesday, January 04, 2012

 
The limo glides by the homeless

man, windows opaque.
Inside, the rider
watches screens.

If prompted--after
eggs and coffee

settle--he'll speak
of freedom. He has

purchased much of it.
Outside, the freedom

to find the very best garbage,
to start a process by selling some.

Quite a stretch
to place him in the limo,

but not the acquisition
of a few tricks of hygiene.

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Tuesday, January 03, 2012

 

When the circus came to Iowa

the truly sly performers
got roundly boxed
in the corn, which

waves when you
fly over, but exudes
a toxic dust on the ground.

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Monday, January 02, 2012

 
Degrees of Brilliance


-The number coming back will be beyond massive!

-Take a chair. It's the opposite by infinite magnitudes.
Smallest I've ever seen!

-What...does it mean?

-Barking up the wrong tree for...

-My whole career! Wasted! And five years till retirement.

-Well, off into the sunset. Unless they bring it to you prematurely.

-I deserve even less than that. We should apologize to our students!

-What good would that do? As scientists, they know such a thing could happen.

-Yeah, to dunderheads!

-Don't be so hard on yourself-- and especially me!
Besides, a plan suggests itself.

-Oh?

-Jump on this new bicycle and ride the bejesus out of it!

-Can't do it that fast!

-You must! In five years, you retire a genius.
Work on your Swedish!

-And do those five geniusing years make up for...?

-That's not a scientific question.

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Sunday, January 01, 2012

 
Condition

The doctor said not to worry about the webbing.
“It doesn’t inhibit your doing much of anything.
Besides, you like to swim. ‘ll make you faster!

“And will I walk like a duck?”

“You already did!”

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