Tuesday, April 30, 2013
-Well, Congressman!
-Never thought I’d hear that. Those last sexual
infelicities they accused me of, I wasn't familiar with
until I googled them. Wife said "Pull any of that and
I'm outa here!"
-Water over the dam. Time to assemble a staff!
I'm sure you have a few in mind, but...
-Hold on! You’re not unloading any deadwood on me!
-Faithful servants of the party!
-Oh yeah? To come only to pick up a check?
Or to show up a day or two out of five,
in a transport of flatulent self-importance!
-You got it all wrong! These people work,
and they know which end is up. You can't
have just eager kids. Too naive in politics.
-I'll balance things off, but not with bums.
-Touché! But I'm entrusted to reward those we're
grateful to. No rewards, no party workers.
-Not much altruism among that bunch, is there?
-Not familiar with the term.
Labels: altruism, corruption, ghosts, patronage, politics, staff
Monday, April 29, 2013
The Rich
aren’t directly load-
ing taxes on
the Middle Class.
Really, they only know
that they themselves
should pay little or none.
Could give a shit less
who’s eventually stung.
Feeling it beneath
their business.
aren’t directly load-
ing taxes on
the Middle Class.
Really, they only know
that they themselves
should pay little or none.
Could give a shit less
who’s eventually stung.
Feeling it beneath
their business.
Labels: equity, Middle Class, rich, taxes, wealthy
Sunday, April 28, 2013
What the Spiritual miss
is Church. The exquisite
moment when all move
together in the Word.
Rare, though, of course--give
you that. On lighter notes,
fragrant casseroles
etc awaited at supper
or picnics with fellow
ravenous parishioners.
Other manifestations
of a different sort
must, too, be cited.
A pastor levered in
politically, who ruled
as second in command
to an acrid and snappish
God. Another whose
youth aesthetic went
to his hands.
Others solid in the Faith
and some saints, even.
Still others rooted
in the Earth.
In short, Life!--being what
the purely spiritual miss,
dwelling in drafty marble halls,
attending ambiguous winds.
is Church. The exquisite
moment when all move
together in the Word.
Rare, though, of course--give
you that. On lighter notes,
fragrant casseroles
etc awaited at supper
or picnics with fellow
ravenous parishioners.
Other manifestations
of a different sort
must, too, be cited.
A pastor levered in
politically, who ruled
as second in command
to an acrid and snappish
God. Another whose
youth aesthetic went
to his hands.
Others solid in the Faith
and some saints, even.
Still others rooted
in the Earth.
In short, Life!--being what
the purely spiritual miss,
dwelling in drafty marble halls,
attending ambiguous winds.
Labels: Church, faith, hypocrisy, religion, spiritual
Saturday, April 27, 2013
The Shy Guy
shares a limo to
the meeting with
two women who
can really talk.
Decides it: He'll
never marry.
Labels: garrulous, marriage, shy, women
Friday, April 26, 2013
The First Commandments of
Democrats and Republicans
D
Thou shalt very very rarely inconvenience The Rich.
R
Thou shalt NEVER inconvenience The Rich.
Labels: Democrat, First Commandment, Republican, rich, wealthy
Uncle Ruslan Stressed Shame
and was replayed
by Republican radio.
Thus, the “good” Muslim.
In another era, a good Negro
could have spoken up.
All these goods, in sum,
make America great.
and was replayed
by Republican radio.
Thus, the “good” Muslim.
In another era, a good Negro
could have spoken up.
All these goods, in sum,
make America great.
Labels: America, Good Muslim, Good Negro, Muslim, Republican, Right Wing Radio, Ruslan
Thursday, April 25, 2013
Addressing a Certain Independent
Though you’re tagging our philosophy
despicable, we do plead competence
next to that leveling crew.
True their bleeding hearts concert
a certain poetry,
but prose rules sensibly,
proving relatively clean,
and, mercifully, less PC.
Though you’re tagging our philosophy
despicable, we do plead competence
next to that leveling crew.
True their bleeding hearts concert
a certain poetry,
but prose rules sensibly,
proving relatively clean,
and, mercifully, less PC.
Labels: bleeding hearts, GOP, Independent, leveling, PC, poetry, prose
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Interrogation
-It’s like the song, huh? Three Little Words?
-I don't go that far back. Nowhere near.
-Just a comparison.
-Not really. In any case, it's Three Little Questions.
-And seemingly innocent and yet insidious?
-I don't know about that. Our work always made
to sound melodramatic. 007 bushwah.
-I know, it's just routine. I pray I never get in its grip.
-We've submitted to the worst in our training.
-Not that bad?
-I'd never say that.
-How Constitutional? That's my trump question.
-Or your chump question. I leave it to the scholars.
-It's everyone's. Yours too.
-Then what I do trumps it.
-That's chilling.
-Only if you're looking for it to be.
-Maybe the nut righties are coherent on this one:
Tyranny!
-They lose their thrust with all their other shit.
But...not for me to say they're crazy or correct.
-Maybe we're all working towards a more perfect
union?
-Be none, if you don't give us our head.
-I'd be careful about that. You should give us
the heads up first!
-Make us impotent. Look! If you want change,
buy it. That's the way it's done. Then it
filters down to me and I cease and desist--
if that’s what you truly want.
-It's come to that, really?
-Where you been?
-Perhaps that should be the first question.
-We don't bother.
-It’s like the song, huh? Three Little Words?
-I don't go that far back. Nowhere near.
-Just a comparison.
-Not really. In any case, it's Three Little Questions.
-And seemingly innocent and yet insidious?
-I don't know about that. Our work always made
to sound melodramatic. 007 bushwah.
-I know, it's just routine. I pray I never get in its grip.
-We've submitted to the worst in our training.
-Not that bad?
-I'd never say that.
-How Constitutional? That's my trump question.
-Or your chump question. I leave it to the scholars.
-It's everyone's. Yours too.
-Then what I do trumps it.
-That's chilling.
-Only if you're looking for it to be.
-Maybe the nut righties are coherent on this one:
Tyranny!
-They lose their thrust with all their other shit.
But...not for me to say they're crazy or correct.
-Maybe we're all working towards a more perfect
union?
-Be none, if you don't give us our head.
-I'd be careful about that. You should give us
the heads up first!
-Make us impotent. Look! If you want change,
buy it. That's the way it's done. Then it
filters down to me and I cease and desist--
if that’s what you truly want.
-It's come to that, really?
-Where you been?
-Perhaps that should be the first question.
-We don't bother.
Labels: bribery, freedom, interrogation, money in politics, Right, tyranny
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
The Free Market should determine...!
Uh huh? Well colluders collude,
and when you stop that--
which is never--you will see
this coherent poetry you dream.
And that won't happen.
And doesn't. So patsies
expect it.
Labels: collusion, Free Market, patsy
Monday, April 22, 2013
Cycle 2050
-Well something must be done: I'm stepping
over starvation bodies in the streets
of this once-great nation.
-Nothing can be done. The Republicans filibuster
anything not directly helping the Rich.
-Then we must apply to The Rich to save us.
The time for pride is over!
-No use. They're strapped bribing the Republicans.
Labels: chaos, cycle, filibuster, Republican, rich, starvation
Sunday, April 21, 2013
The Man Without a Mind
functioned pretty well actually.
Imprinted circuits allowed him
to imitate others.
Nobody could tell the difference.
functioned pretty well actually.
Imprinted circuits allowed him
to imitate others.
Nobody could tell the difference.
Saturday, April 20, 2013
“Mauve Epaulettes?”–-his quizzical tailor
“They could be a problem. I'll dye yellow ones.
Motley tunic? I'll make it resemble camouflage.
So you'll be Military Camp all right!”
Mickey at Flying Feet still working on getting
Yellow Air Jordans.
He thought a real sword, but rejected it
for a huge one he'd fashion from cardboard
and tinfoil.
Brick had left him. Again. So, Very Young Person
would escort him. Oh the scandal!...as if anyone cared.
Last would be appearance before Jillene,
Office Manager and, evolvingly, Life Coach.
Two years ago she announced at his costume:
"I'm not feeling it! Not! Like, triple!" They fought,
oh did they! But upshot: changed everything.
Everything! Up all night.
Proved a triumph. So, Cup was his at last.
She now spent a good amount of time polishing it,
touches from Allied Cleaning Service forbidden.
There was she loving. In all else, ice.
Soon, he'd face her once again. Oh well,
faint heart ne’er won fair...much of anything.
“They could be a problem. I'll dye yellow ones.
Motley tunic? I'll make it resemble camouflage.
So you'll be Military Camp all right!”
Mickey at Flying Feet still working on getting
Yellow Air Jordans.
He thought a real sword, but rejected it
for a huge one he'd fashion from cardboard
and tinfoil.
Brick had left him. Again. So, Very Young Person
would escort him. Oh the scandal!...as if anyone cared.
Last would be appearance before Jillene,
Office Manager and, evolvingly, Life Coach.
Two years ago she announced at his costume:
"I'm not feeling it! Not! Like, triple!" They fought,
oh did they! But upshot: changed everything.
Everything! Up all night.
Proved a triumph. So, Cup was his at last.
She now spent a good amount of time polishing it,
touches from Allied Cleaning Service forbidden.
There was she loving. In all else, ice.
Soon, he'd face her once again. Oh well,
faint heart ne’er won fair...much of anything.
Labels: camp, campy, costume ball
Friday, April 19, 2013
For joy of debate,
love CSPAN where
seething racists
and gun cretins
strap in for
“Constitutional” points.
Labels: Constitution, Constitutional, CSPAN, gun control, guns, Race, racist
Thursday, April 18, 2013
Moonbeams and Meretricious
Let’s get this
complete: Congress
wills Loony Tunes to
buy assault rifles
with maximum clips.
Enshrining such a right
next to that of buy-
ing an election
for saner sorts.
I know, I know, my fault in
oversimplifying in such rot-
ten ways, since, in truth,
the place is just
a pressure pot.
Let’s get this
complete: Congress
wills Loony Tunes to
buy assault rifles
with maximum clips.
Enshrining such a right
next to that of buy-
ing an election
for saner sorts.
I know, I know, my fault in
oversimplifying in such rot-
ten ways, since, in truth,
the place is just
a pressure pot.
Labels: assault weapon, Congress, gun control, gun politics, Gun Republicans, pressure pot, senate
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
The Way of the Transgressor is Hard
I’ve seen posh.
With Senator
for miscreant’s friend.
Thus, affecting
legislation.
If both get harshly caught,
pardons can be wrought.
And hath. Though messy
business--what with
God continuously invoked.
Whole foregoing toxicity
‘s called a system--in
case there’s a quiz.
I’ve seen posh.
With Senator
for miscreant’s friend.
Thus, affecting
legislation.
If both get harshly caught,
pardons can be wrought.
And hath. Though messy
business--what with
God continuously invoked.
Whole foregoing toxicity
‘s called a system--in
case there’s a quiz.
Labels: bribery, crony, senator, system
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Lord and Lady
-The kitchen girls said the newspapers claim that
miners begged door to door in Mrs Thatcher’s...
-They shouldn’t be reading those Left rags! But...there
you have it with the miners. You can see it clearly.
No pride! Be a cold day in hell before I’d...I’d starve first.
You have my word on that!
-That’s what I loved in you from the start, the stubbornness.
-I mean it! Starve!
-Why are the girls never here for your really good moments?
-They’re where they should be. School.
-But Switzerland is so far!
-I’ll take independent young ladies anytime! Let them bounce
about the world a bit!
-Well, they have their cells. I expect to hear today.
-One would suffice.
-The kitchen girls said the newspapers claim that
miners begged door to door in Mrs Thatcher’s...
-They shouldn’t be reading those Left rags! But...there
you have it with the miners. You can see it clearly.
No pride! Be a cold day in hell before I’d...I’d starve first.
You have my word on that!
-That’s what I loved in you from the start, the stubbornness.
-I mean it! Starve!
-Why are the girls never here for your really good moments?
-They’re where they should be. School.
-But Switzerland is so far!
-I’ll take independent young ladies anytime! Let them bounce
about the world a bit!
-Well, they have their cells. I expect to hear today.
-One would suffice.
Labels: class, girls, Lady, Lord, miners, Thatcher
Monday, April 15, 2013
Tragic Sequence
Jonathan Winters
out of time.
Should be heading
into prime.
Thus depicting
a gun idiot.
Jonathan Winters
out of time.
Should be heading
into prime.
Thus depicting
a gun idiot.
Labels: gun nut, gun politics, Winters
Sunday, April 14, 2013
Coastals
EAST
I'll hafta go to the West Coast.
The solution's on the ground.
WEST
You've done. And here you are.
The spotlight points with disgust.
EAST
Quite so. The former. Facts before opinion.
WEST
I'm listening.
EAST
You must set out the problem.
WEST
I don't do inventory.
EAST
I'm on my own then?
WEST
Emphatically! Sam Spade after partner Miles
x'd by Mary Astor.
EAST
Wifty, yet calculating.
WEST
You‘ve met my wives?
EAST
No, and I never sang for your father.
WEST
That's okay. My father sang for your father.
EAST
Chums then?
WEST
No. He was too awful.
EAST
Back to the case at hand. I abstract, since
you won't cooperate.
WEST
Do! But shake a leg! Lunch can't be late.
EAST
A hates B because of C. Therefore E is the
culprit.
WEST
You think?
EAST
Not really. By turning the solution upside
down, it's actually V.
WEST
Shall we notify police?
EAST
Not so! We've privatized Justice. You and I
will take out V.
WEST
Our usual method?
EAST
Talk her to death.
WEST
I didn't know she was a she.
EAST
Nor did she. That's where the complexity of
the case becomes complex.
WEST
When you heading back?
EAST
So Murphy, the Irish Wolfhound, can reclaim my
sordid cot? At any rate, I bore you. My tragic flaw.
WEST
One.
EAST
Yes, they're lining up out the door.
WEST
And down the street past the Lyric.
EAST
Starring Humphrey Bogart as Sam.
WEST
That’s what the marquee says. It goes on
The one with Mary Astor.
EAST
That's vague even for us. Get the step ladder.
We'll put up the letters of The Maltese Falcon.
WEST
Or Falcone in the Italian version. And one sounds
the terminal letter.
EAST
Always and forever. Let's meet halfway next
time. I'm worn and torn by air travel, packed
into a tube stinking of fellow men.
WEST
The gals are perfumed. Don't add them to
your satire.
EAST
They're excluded by your recommendation.
Not that they’ll thank anyone!
WEST
Where is halfway, by the bye?
EAST
Pittsburgh.
WEST
Your geography is as brilliant as your wit.
EAST
Nonetheless, my advice to you stays constant:
Take two and hit to right.
WEST
But if I do that I never land the big salary
the sluggers get.
EAST
Amen amen I say to you, they also serve who only
land bloopers.
WEST
Our whole lives are bloopers.
EAST
Leave us to heaven. I’m hungry.
EAST
I'll hafta go to the West Coast.
The solution's on the ground.
WEST
You've done. And here you are.
The spotlight points with disgust.
EAST
Quite so. The former. Facts before opinion.
WEST
I'm listening.
EAST
You must set out the problem.
WEST
I don't do inventory.
EAST
I'm on my own then?
WEST
Emphatically! Sam Spade after partner Miles
x'd by Mary Astor.
EAST
Wifty, yet calculating.
WEST
You‘ve met my wives?
EAST
No, and I never sang for your father.
WEST
That's okay. My father sang for your father.
EAST
Chums then?
WEST
No. He was too awful.
EAST
Back to the case at hand. I abstract, since
you won't cooperate.
WEST
Do! But shake a leg! Lunch can't be late.
EAST
A hates B because of C. Therefore E is the
culprit.
WEST
You think?
EAST
Not really. By turning the solution upside
down, it's actually V.
WEST
Shall we notify police?
EAST
Not so! We've privatized Justice. You and I
will take out V.
WEST
Our usual method?
EAST
Talk her to death.
WEST
I didn't know she was a she.
EAST
Nor did she. That's where the complexity of
the case becomes complex.
WEST
When you heading back?
EAST
So Murphy, the Irish Wolfhound, can reclaim my
sordid cot? At any rate, I bore you. My tragic flaw.
WEST
One.
EAST
Yes, they're lining up out the door.
WEST
And down the street past the Lyric.
EAST
Starring Humphrey Bogart as Sam.
WEST
That’s what the marquee says. It goes on
The one with Mary Astor.
EAST
That's vague even for us. Get the step ladder.
We'll put up the letters of The Maltese Falcon.
WEST
Or Falcone in the Italian version. And one sounds
the terminal letter.
EAST
Always and forever. Let's meet halfway next
time. I'm worn and torn by air travel, packed
into a tube stinking of fellow men.
WEST
The gals are perfumed. Don't add them to
your satire.
EAST
They're excluded by your recommendation.
Not that they’ll thank anyone!
WEST
Where is halfway, by the bye?
EAST
Pittsburgh.
WEST
Your geography is as brilliant as your wit.
EAST
Nonetheless, my advice to you stays constant:
Take two and hit to right.
WEST
But if I do that I never land the big salary
the sluggers get.
EAST
Amen amen I say to you, they also serve who only
land bloopers.
WEST
Our whole lives are bloopers.
EAST
Leave us to heaven. I’m hungry.
Labels: Astor, Bogart, Coastal, East, friendship, Hollywood, West
Saturday, April 13, 2013
Revelation
INVESTIGATOR1
We have Lucinda Ardenti Rohllerz as your
third wife.
ROHL
And last. She pretty much did the institution in.
INVESTIGATOR1 and 2
We can understand that.
ROHL
But I’ve gone too far! No further until I see some
credentials.
INVESTIGATOR1
Which we're instructed not to show.
INVESTIGATOR2
If you'll bear with us, just to help
us flesh out the story here.
INVESTIGATOR1
The Bowling Disaster?
ROHL
Ouch! You got that?
INVESTIGATOR2
And much more.
INVESTIGATOR1
Would you mind...?
ROHL
No. Might do some good. Anyway I was a first class
bowler. Tops for our terrific team. And then
in the City Championship I inexplicably threw
a couple of gutter balls. Everybody was thoroughly
pissed, and yet embarrassed for me at the same time.
INVESTIGATOR2
Gutter...? (then something in quick Italian from 1)
ROHL
Mystery clearing, Gentlemen. You're from Vatican!
INVESTIGATOR1 and 2
We can neither confirm or deny...
ROHL
Investigating Lucinda? I don't understand.
She was a handful and fiery, but...
INVESTIGATOR1 and 2
Yes!
INVESTIGATOR1
You've of course have heard the expression:
The Devil can appear in any form?
ROHL
This is like something the gang at Lippy’s Kool Kup’d
cook up! But their absurd surrogates wouldn’t hold the
grave expressions this long without cracking up.
INVESTIGATOR1
A grave matter indeed.
ROHL
Her?
INVESTIGATOR2
We think so.
ROHL
Well, it was a hell of a fight before her decease.
INVESTIGATOR1
One would think.
ROHL
But I pretty much gave as good as I got.
INVESTIGATOR2
Before the bowling.
ROHL
Are you saying that she...as the Devil...?
INVESTIGATOR1
We have records pointing there.
ROHL
What a shock! Give me a second or two.
INVESTIGATOR1 and 2
We understand.
ROHL
In...a way it was like my other two marriages.
So I never suspected...
INVESTIGATOR1
One wouldn't, of course.
INVESTIGATOR2
Did you ever see any scorching? Places
she had recently been?
ROHL
Not really. Just the verbal variety. I thought
she was just, as I said, a handful!
INVESTIGATOR1
And continues to be!
They asked him many more questions after that.
And cautioned him to tell no one. Informing
him also, that any copy of their report
would be forbidden him.
ROHL
I don't have to read it. Everything makes
more sense now.
INVESTIGATOR1
We'd like to leave you with a special kit.
ROHL
Now let's just hold on there! I'm not that
superstitious. Not going to give in to that!
INVESTIGATOR2
In the event she comes back?
ROHL
No way! This is Century Number 21 for Godssakes!
The two made the sign of the cross at this.
He got their umbrellas. The reason he talked
to them from the start was his boredom
from the beastly rain. When he opened the
outside door for them, Rohl changed his mind,
and they graciously left the kit.
INVESTIGATOR1
We have Lucinda Ardenti Rohllerz as your
third wife.
ROHL
And last. She pretty much did the institution in.
INVESTIGATOR1 and 2
We can understand that.
ROHL
But I’ve gone too far! No further until I see some
credentials.
INVESTIGATOR1
Which we're instructed not to show.
INVESTIGATOR2
If you'll bear with us, just to help
us flesh out the story here.
INVESTIGATOR1
The Bowling Disaster?
ROHL
Ouch! You got that?
INVESTIGATOR2
And much more.
INVESTIGATOR1
Would you mind...?
ROHL
No. Might do some good. Anyway I was a first class
bowler. Tops for our terrific team. And then
in the City Championship I inexplicably threw
a couple of gutter balls. Everybody was thoroughly
pissed, and yet embarrassed for me at the same time.
INVESTIGATOR2
Gutter...? (then something in quick Italian from 1)
ROHL
Mystery clearing, Gentlemen. You're from Vatican!
INVESTIGATOR1 and 2
We can neither confirm or deny...
ROHL
Investigating Lucinda? I don't understand.
She was a handful and fiery, but...
INVESTIGATOR1 and 2
Yes!
INVESTIGATOR1
You've of course have heard the expression:
The Devil can appear in any form?
ROHL
This is like something the gang at Lippy’s Kool Kup’d
cook up! But their absurd surrogates wouldn’t hold the
grave expressions this long without cracking up.
INVESTIGATOR1
A grave matter indeed.
ROHL
Her?
INVESTIGATOR2
We think so.
ROHL
Well, it was a hell of a fight before her decease.
INVESTIGATOR1
One would think.
ROHL
But I pretty much gave as good as I got.
INVESTIGATOR2
Before the bowling.
ROHL
Are you saying that she...as the Devil...?
INVESTIGATOR1
We have records pointing there.
ROHL
What a shock! Give me a second or two.
INVESTIGATOR1 and 2
We understand.
ROHL
In...a way it was like my other two marriages.
So I never suspected...
INVESTIGATOR1
One wouldn't, of course.
INVESTIGATOR2
Did you ever see any scorching? Places
she had recently been?
ROHL
Not really. Just the verbal variety. I thought
she was just, as I said, a handful!
INVESTIGATOR1
And continues to be!
They asked him many more questions after that.
And cautioned him to tell no one. Informing
him also, that any copy of their report
would be forbidden him.
ROHL
I don't have to read it. Everything makes
more sense now.
INVESTIGATOR1
We'd like to leave you with a special kit.
ROHL
Now let's just hold on there! I'm not that
superstitious. Not going to give in to that!
INVESTIGATOR2
In the event she comes back?
ROHL
No way! This is Century Number 21 for Godssakes!
The two made the sign of the cross at this.
He got their umbrellas. The reason he talked
to them from the start was his boredom
from the beastly rain. When he opened the
outside door for them, Rohl changed his mind,
and they graciously left the kit.
Labels: bowling, devil, marriage, Vatican
Friday, April 12, 2013
Second Amendment Rights
Take to the streets. Be coy
in shooting someone
at complete random.
Make your point up-
holding 18th Century
horseshit.
Take to the streets. Be coy
in shooting someone
at complete random.
Make your point up-
holding 18th Century
horseshit.
Labels: 18th Century, Constitution, disfunction, horseshit, murder, Second Amendment, violence
Thursday, April 11, 2013
The Conservative Answer
Nothing can be done,
or even tried,
nor should it be,
for inertia comforts
the comfortable.
We act further only
to afflict
the afflicted.
Teaching them
virtue thereby.
Nothing can be done,
or even tried,
nor should it be,
for inertia comforts
the comfortable.
We act further only
to afflict
the afflicted.
Teaching them
virtue thereby.
Labels: afflicted, comfortable, Conservative
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
The man who was meticulous in just about everything
went completely! Sgts Calderone and Mixx called to
pocket park fronting the new condos on West Division
Street, 9:12 PM.
He was alternately giggling and roaring up into fluffy
snow, whole white scene lit by highrise windows.
Said Sgts labeled “Nut Squad” at precinct: last week
breaking up a fist fight between Napoleon and
Mickey Mantle, Calvary Baptist Soup Kitchen.
Aforementioned meticulous one claimed to be
Steve Jobs, proving he pretty much kept up.
Footprints in the snow ultimately told the story
of his struggle.
Labels: delusional, Mickey Mantle, Napoleon, nervous breakdown, nut, police, Steve Jobs
Tuesday, April 09, 2013
When Revered Righties Die
mourning is electric,
much protracted in
their clahss.
Take that!
Ruffians.
mourning is electric,
much protracted in
their clahss.
Take that!
Ruffians.
Labels: mourning, Right, Thatcher
Monday, April 08, 2013
Fractions Unhurried
I went with others against
the 3/5s designation.
Long slog, but got Chamber
to raise it a 5th to 4.
Really lovely ceremony
where we got engraved
certificates we could
take to job interviews.
Hunting in adjacent field later, I
got the ear of Chamber President.
Yelling “5/5ths next time?”
“Just let's not get all
hog wild!
But in the next generation
or so,” he confided, “I
can very nearly see it.”
Labels: Article 1, Justice, Race, racial politics, Section 2, Three Fifths Compromise
Sunday, April 07, 2013
Beholders’ Eyes
-Handsome guys stroll the wings rehearsing their lies.
-But they know them perfectly.
-Then...working on delivery.
-Yet, they stand not a chance!
-Crazy, isn’t it? The most beautiful woman in the
city and she yearns for this swarthy dwarf you see before you.
-And usually wish I didn’t.
-Precisely!
-You’re, I’m beginning to think...just trying to escape responsibility.
-I can’t get used to it. It’s impossible!
-Well, youse surely ugly and twisted yes, but not quite to the point where children
throw stones.
-Damn near. I’m the disgusting frog and she’s...
-Yeah yeah yeah! Princess! So what? You best
catch hold! This woman wants to marry you, not partake
in a seminar exploring myth.
-I felt safe with those seminar gals. They’re terrific!
-Schools out, ephebe! But they’re the only women
this slouch can relate to–-that’s my tragedy. With you,
all is farce.
-Only because I’m not pretty.
-That’s merely the truth. But, coming back to her, a great strain of romance.
-Great strain all right!
-Pick my little niece Taffy for flower girl. She never gets picked for anything.
-I’m suddenly a symbol.
-Good one for once.
Labels: beauty, friendship, marriage, Romance, ugliness
Saturday, April 06, 2013
The Man Who Assembled an Orange Is Dead
Those who said he substituted an actual orange
for the last step have been rightly disgraced.
However, nothing tickled him more, and he
laughed uproariously every time it was
brought up.
No, the video record was meticulously clear.
He started at eight of a Sunday morning
and by eleven, Voila! Of course the
materials took quite a long time beforehand.
Since the record was so complete, the two
judges, one the science advisor for the President
and the other a Provost at MIT, decided to
eat the orange.
Here you, schooled in Irony, will speculate that
it tasted lousy.
But the judges claimed it was a shame
ever to eat anything ever again.
It was that spectacularly delicious!
Those who said he substituted an actual orange
for the last step have been rightly disgraced.
However, nothing tickled him more, and he
laughed uproariously every time it was
brought up.
No, the video record was meticulously clear.
He started at eight of a Sunday morning
and by eleven, Voila! Of course the
materials took quite a long time beforehand.
Since the record was so complete, the two
judges, one the science advisor for the President
and the other a Provost at MIT, decided to
eat the orange.
Here you, schooled in Irony, will speculate that
it tasted lousy.
But the judges claimed it was a shame
ever to eat anything ever again.
It was that spectacularly delicious!
Labels: botany, irony, orange, science, skepticism
Friday, April 05, 2013
Neighborhood
-Did all the things my parents did. And when I finally
got my own apartment, followed suit.
-Like?
-Went to Crabby Cal’s.
-Not so bad I hear.
-Cal an indifferent chef, but buys the best in meats,
breads, produce. Doesn’t ruin anything.
-High praise indeed!
-Go to same barber my father does. Every chubby finger a powerhouse of garlic! I can’t breathe by the time he spritzes witch hazel on my neck!
-Kind of a prisoner of the neighborhood?
-Not the half of it! And they didn’t have the spiffy twins of washer-dryer from Sears. We always used a laundry. Man did that place smell of coal dust! Had some big commercial accounts too and stoked the boilers with soft coal. My clothes still have, like, a sulphur whiff to them.
-So THAT’S what that is? I thought Lucifer was stepping round.
-Some day I’ll make a clean break and move downtown.
-Where the action is!–-or as much as this sleepy burg
can muster.
-And the women! Daughters of friends.
-Good stock enough.
-Enchantresses all! Trying to trick you into forty-fifty years of homegrown sex before you’re
thrown into the ground!
-Hey! You don’t think they haven’t got their sisters
stationed downtown?
-There’s really no hope for anything.
-Psychiatrists say you hafta change yourself. And then
the whole world gets in line. A desultory process,
but they have no choice due to your new-found power.
-A miracle! They might as well be priests.
-Well, much as this happy horseshit edifies, got dental
appointment. See you around.
-I’ll be there.
-Did all the things my parents did. And when I finally
got my own apartment, followed suit.
-Like?
-Went to Crabby Cal’s.
-Not so bad I hear.
-Cal an indifferent chef, but buys the best in meats,
breads, produce. Doesn’t ruin anything.
-High praise indeed!
-Go to same barber my father does. Every chubby finger a powerhouse of garlic! I can’t breathe by the time he spritzes witch hazel on my neck!
-Kind of a prisoner of the neighborhood?
-Not the half of it! And they didn’t have the spiffy twins of washer-dryer from Sears. We always used a laundry. Man did that place smell of coal dust! Had some big commercial accounts too and stoked the boilers with soft coal. My clothes still have, like, a sulphur whiff to them.
-So THAT’S what that is? I thought Lucifer was stepping round.
-Some day I’ll make a clean break and move downtown.
-Where the action is!–-or as much as this sleepy burg
can muster.
-And the women! Daughters of friends.
-Good stock enough.
-Enchantresses all! Trying to trick you into forty-fifty years of homegrown sex before you’re
thrown into the ground!
-Hey! You don’t think they haven’t got their sisters
stationed downtown?
-There’s really no hope for anything.
-Psychiatrists say you hafta change yourself. And then
the whole world gets in line. A desultory process,
but they have no choice due to your new-found power.
-A miracle! They might as well be priests.
-Well, much as this happy horseshit edifies, got dental
appointment. See you around.
-I’ll be there.
Labels: leaving nest, neighborhood, parochial, young men
Thursday, April 04, 2013
Love in the British Isles
-Married twenty five years, so we sang Always
to them in the pub. Every verse. Molly the
Postmaster’s wife printed ‘em up.
-Touching, the whole thing.
-It was just lovely singing, and they cried.
They left feeling no pain. Still work to do at
the cottage. He was going hunting next morning,
and got her to clean the rifle by whispering
"When the things I plan need a helping hand."
-Charming, but I don't know if I like where this could
be heading.
-The old round left in the chamber thing?
-Dead? Him?
-Or a reasonable imitation.
-Jesus Christ!
-What she said.
-Must've been sad funeral, so close to the
pub party.
-The mistress wouldn't leave off yowling.
Labels: Always, Great Britain, marriage, pub
Wednesday, April 03, 2013
Two Wags Après War
-Well, we shocked and awed the shit outa ’em!
-Granted. But what then? Like, what's left
for the not-dead? We’re forced into the
massive rebuilding of shattered buildings
and infrastructure...not to mention the black
market in high-tech artificial body parts.
-Okay then, Shock, Awe, and Graft.
-The American Triumvirate!
Labels: graft, infrastructure, post war, rebuilding, Shock and Awe, war
Tuesday, April 02, 2013
The New South
Sheriff always joked he met his
wife in the Colored Waiting Room.
A crew of painters from the German
war prisoner camp had re-lettered
the signs in a kind of Gothic script--
all but unreadable.
Sheriff not the stereotypical movie fatso.
He was skinny and wore glasses. Looked like
a professor of Social Psychology.
If forced to part a skull in the Civil Rights era, though,
he did.
Long retired, he loved talking of that time, and emphasized
the violence a bit more than he should have.
But then, retired folks often brag.
Sheriff always joked he met his
wife in the Colored Waiting Room.
A crew of painters from the German
war prisoner camp had re-lettered
the signs in a kind of Gothic script--
all but unreadable.
Sheriff not the stereotypical movie fatso.
He was skinny and wore glasses. Looked like
a professor of Social Psychology.
If forced to part a skull in the Civil Rights era, though,
he did.
Long retired, he loved talking of that time, and emphasized
the violence a bit more than he should have.
But then, retired folks often brag.
Labels: Civil Rights, German War Prisoner, New South, South, violence
Monday, April 01, 2013
Adhering Words
Religions inform us
as to what ruling class
proscribes as moral.
Governments follow suit,
their doctrines too
gussied up with just peachy
language mush-
ing about in both Pre-
amble and Bible.
So, everywhere, really. Though
Scandinavians give better life,
Italians and Greeks more cacophonic.
Thus do we rack up the middle isthmus
of Capitalistic Desire.
Religions inform us
as to what ruling class
proscribes as moral.
Governments follow suit,
their doctrines too
gussied up with just peachy
language mush-
ing about in both Pre-
amble and Bible.
So, everywhere, really. Though
Scandinavians give better life,
Italians and Greeks more cacophonic.
Thus do we rack up the middle isthmus
of Capitalistic Desire.
Labels: Bible, Capitalism, Greek, Italian, Preamble, ruling class, Scandinavia
